I spent the morning snorkelling off a secluded mangrove islet, exploring three-metre-high corals swarming with neon-bright fish. Now, I’m sitting on my own private desert island eating grapes from a picnic hamper, as cyan-coloured waters lap at my feet. Swap me for a couple with newly minted rings, and you’ve got a rom-com just waiting to be filmed.
Toss in a couple of life jackets and some flotsam, and this could be a scene from every survivor film you’ve ever seen. (There are even little white crabs which I’m sure would just as happily eat any “dead” extras that wash ashore as they will my crumbs.)
Given such scenery, it’s no surprise that Idris Elba has announced plans to open a film studio in Zanzibar. This Indian Ocean chain, off Tanzania, has everything a casting agent could hope for. Its beaches and reefs could double as anywhere from Fiji to the Florida Keys. There are ancient Omani forts and palaces – including many that have been reclaimed by the jungle. And, if you drive beyond its resorts, you’ll find banana groves and paddy fields, ox-carts and coral stone villages.
This variety is what has pulled me back to Zanzibar time and again over the past two decades. When I first came, it was somewhere only backpackers visited. In the past few years, however, Zanzibar has seen a slew of upmarket hotel openings, and recent holidays here have overlapped stays by everyone from the guy in the Dolce & Gabbana ads to Oprah’s inner circle – who booked the presidential suite at the hotel I was at.
What’s more, with celeb-favourites like Le Méridien and The Four Seasons set to open on Zanzibar’s eponymous main island later this year, it’s probably just a matter of time until Oprah is spotted here, too.
Construction tenders are apparently already out for the studio where her friends might end up working, as I discovered from South African ex-pat Lisa de Lange, whose brother is vying to supply the solar panels on its roof.
I met Lisa while staying at Elewana Kilindi, a boutique hotel built by ABBA’s Benny Andersson – and reminiscent of a Bond villain’s sexy lair with its cabana-lined pool, whitewashed flying buttresses and waterfall behind the bar.
Kilindi is the sort of place that could have been purpose-built for Hollywood stars on a break from filming, right down to the open-to-nature bathrooms with uninterrupted views over the bay. You almost need an A-lister’s confidence to not worry about the distant, ant-sized fishermen while you shower.
Featuring private butlers, and catering to a maximum of 30 guests, this sprwaling cliff-side retreat is one of the most extravagant places I’ve ever stayed, with its separate bedroom, bathroom and living room pavilions set within their own gardens with private plunge pools and bolted gateways for maximum privacy.
A night in one of its private hamlets is not strictly “cheap”, with stays starting from $558pp, all inclusive, based on two people sharing. But it’s a fraction of what you’d pay for such opulence in the nearby Maldives.
Zanzibar does have some real blow-outs, though, like the recently renovated &Beyond Mnemba Island, where Tom Cruise, Naomi Campbell and Bill Gates stayed when they visited the island. There’s also the new private island at Bawe, whose overwater villas you reach by speedboat (and soon helicopter), and which looks like one of those swanky hotels from the White Lotus TV series, with its designer, palm-print furniture, and staff lined up at the jetty in all-white.
Rwanda’s Paul Kagame is said to have booked out the whole of Bawe for his daughter’s wedding last year. But you don’t have to have to have a multi-millionaire president for a father to live it up on Zanzibar. I stayed at a new five-star with rooms from just $125 – or $62.50pp, room only – after leaving Kilindi.
Right on the beach, and featuring enormous terrazzo-tiled bathrooms, rain showers and sumptuous chaise-longues, the 82-room LUX* Marijani has everything you could ask for in a Zanzibar hotel, from free kayak and SUP rentals, to a spa with cinematic views of the palm trees and white sand.
It may not be quite exclusive enough to lure Hollywood actors on a break from filming. The same, however, cannot be said of The Residence, from where I set sail from for my picnic to the desert island.
Located in Zanzibar’s sparsely populated south, The Residence’s 66 Mauritius-style villas combine the private lap pools and sun terraces, which former guests like Will Smith expect, with a price-tag non-celebs can afford: villas begin from $445, half board, or $223pp a night.
Each bungalow comes with a spacious lounge with dark-wood settee and desk, huge bedroom with four-poster bed, and palatial bathroom with freestanding bath and indoor and outdoor showers. The resort also has everything a Hollywood actor could need in a home away from home – from tennis court, library and spa, to one of the most well-stocked hotel gyms I’ve ever worked out at.
Those looking for somewhere even more exclusive would probably prefer Fundu Lagoon; $357pp, all inclusive. Not accessible by road, this multi-award-winning retreat is so remote you have to reach it via a high-speed RIB, having first caught a 30-minute flight to the archipelago’s northern outcrop, Pemba.
It’s the sort of place a star could go to really escape prying eyes. I was one of only two foreigners on the Auric Air flight to Pemba, and the only guest staying in Fundu Lagoon’s 13 luxury safari tents on my first night there. All rustic decks and coconut-fibre ropes, Fundu’s the fantasy project of costume designer Ellis Flyte and Brian Henson, of The Muppets fame.
It’s wild. There are flying foxes in the trees and monkeys in the restaurant (where I’m served sweet avocado bruschetta, Swahili curries and South African wines). Each night, a friendly kingfisher sploshes into my plunge pool for a wash, and a needy bushbaby cries from my sundeck as I read in my king-sized bed.
Famous for its diving, I watch chameleon-like puffer fish changing colours while snorkelling at nearby Misali reef, and spot enormous tiger fish almost the size of me. Again, the scenery is incredibly varied. I go on a kayaking trip down rivers that could double as Amazonian tributaries. It feels like I’ve paddled into a scene from Anaconda – or maybe a Vietnam War epic. Idris Elba is definitely on to something…
Turquoise Holidays has five nights at The Residence Zanzibar from $1,807pp, half board, including flights from Johannesburg and transfers.
For best deals and tour packages to Zanzibar click here. To compare, search and book affordable hotel & flight, visit this website here.
